


Caramelised Beef

by Pokesy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Fanon, First work - Freeform, Homestuck Epilogues - Freeform, I Will rewrite the entire Homestuck Epilogues, Kind of Canon Compliant, M/M, Multi, Non canon compliant, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-24 10:00:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20905796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pokesy/pseuds/Pokesy
Summary: Meat or Candy, John? Meat or Candy? When a decision is as clearly mindbending as this, John will need a little help from a being not quite from this world to remind him that a. He can easily have a bit of meat, and a bit of candy, and b. As a Rogue of Void who has god tiered, Roxy can quite easily just use their powers to create food that has elements of both meat and candy, which are not quite so raw and not quite so sweet, for a more balanced meal.





	Caramelised Beef

**Author's Note:**

> (This is my first Fic about Homestuck, so a lot of it might seem out of character, or not very good! If it's that bad I'll probably fix it up and make it better in the future or something, ha ha.. I hope you enjoy this fic though! <3)

## Prologue

>   

> 
> Meat or candy. The two possibilities pinball around your skull. Meat or candy. It’s a tough choice. On any other day you might be inclined to simply follow the whims of your cravings, but no clear victor surges to the forefront of your mind.
> 
> Either option offers a tempting means of sustenance. You know the meat will be rich and filling, and if you’re being honest with yourself, you haven’t had the most robust diet as of late. You didn’t even have breakfast. It’s probably a good idea to eat something resembling a real meal for once.
> 
> But you’re no stranger to Calliope’s tastes, as far as carnivorous comestibles are concerned. You know every cut on that plate is rare to the core. It’ll fill your mouth to bursting with juice, lie heavy on your stomach for hours to come as your body works to break down all the nutritious protein and fat.
> 
> It might be tough to chew. It might be even tougher to swallow.
> 
> Maybe the candy is the better choice for a picnic like this. Something that’ll go down easy and fill you with bright energy as you pass the time with your friends. You know you need to just let go sometimes, and stop worrying so much about what other people expect of you. Or even what you expect of you. It’s not a bad thing to enjoy yourself just for the sake of pleasure.
> 
> But eat too much and all that sweetness could make you sick.
> 
> Roxy and Calliope glance at each other in confusion as you deliberate over what to eat. You suppose it’s taking you a while to choose, but each dish is appealing enough in certain ways. Each has its potential dietary drawbacks. You don’t want to make a decision you can’t stomach.
> 
> Meat or candy, John. Meat or candy?
> 
> You release your breath when you realize you’ve been holding it. You’re being ridiculous. What’s the sense of fussing over lunch? In the end, it really doesn’t matter. Whatever you choose, it’ll all be flushed down the toilet tomorrow.
> 
> Just go with your gut. Don’t sweat the small stuff. There are much more important things out there to fuck yourself up over. 

## >Reach towards your meal.

You're reaching towards the food, but your hand seems to stay as your eyes looked over the two options. You're stuck in that state for so long now that it feels like you've been here for months, for years. What you just need is more time, you just need to get out of here and think, you suddenly think to yourself. Why need to make a decision now? It's not really something you need to be doing, you also decide. I - You mean, your retcon powers! You can still escape from this!

## >Use your retcon powers to turn back time to before you had to make this choice.

It doesn't... work? You reach out to that now familiar power, your hand still outstretched towards the options, Meat, and Candy, and you feel the distinct feeling of something gripping deep into your soul, into your very being, and ripping that out of you. You're doubled over now, and everything seems to change perspective, just a slight. As if something new has taken over, something that _ should not be touching the fucking narrative! _

There's not much time to be worrying about any of that, though, or what could be happening right now, as your friends are here! And they seem more worried than usual!

ROXY: ....john? uve been kind of quiet  
ROXY: is this too soon are you having a panic attack  
JOHN: what? yeah im fine. just... thinking. about stuff.  
CALLIOPE: like we said john! if yoU're not ready it coUld soil the resUlts! yes the entire timeline coUld potentially be destroyed bUt! if yoU do not make this decision yoUrself then there could be  
JOHN: fine! fine!!!!!!!! i pick meat! wait! no! candy! wait no meat because its filling! wait but i also   


## >Pick Meat, John. That's what you want, you're so hungry. And it's so filling.

John raises his hand out towards the meat, going to take it because he wanted to have a full stomach before having such an _ important _ decision. 

But John does not reach it. He pulls his hand back. Despite the man in Orange trying desperately trying to keep John under his control. This is not his story anymore, and I am going to fix it. I'm going to start here, and then I'm going to fix all of it, for them! 

>Your name is John Egbert. You are 23 years old. It was 10 years ago you were given a name. And now you are given a choice. Meat, or Candy? Or... will you choose something else? 


End file.
